Just Say NO To Bugs In Thailand!!!!

3/4/04

Sawadee Krup dudes, dudettes and other furry monsters…

Well, we are currently sitting in an internet cafe on Rai Leh Beach in Southern
Thailand after a gruelling 26 hour trip from Ko Chang Island near the Cambodian border where we have been seriously chilling for the last few days…

…Yep, the last few days we’ve been festering our a’rses off slumming in beach bungalows only meters from the waters edge, snorkeling, getting $6 massages and living totally on prawns and squid which has been really COOL and very relaxing….

…although I reckon that if we hear any more Bob Marley on this trip, our pubes are going to start to grow into dreadlocks….

Anyways, we reckon we totally deserved a bit of a dreadlock holiday since traveling through Cambodia completely shagged us senseless!!!

Don’t get us wrong, we really, really enjoyed Cambodia but the poverty, the constant begging and the haemorrhoid busting roads totally made travelling around really emotionally draining and gave us a sore ar’se at the same time… Continue reading

6 Hours In A Leaky Boat In Cambodia

8/3/04

Sau S’dei all you funky monkeys and secret squirrels…

Well, we are currently sitting in an internet cafe on the Tonle Sap river in Phnom Pehn in Cambodia, and we are well and truly shaggedd!!!!!! Well at least I am… Avril is sitting next to me and is being chatted up by some monks who have been surfing the net!!!!

We have just gotten in from a 6 hour very painful horror boat ride from Siem Reap in the North of Cambodia which SUCKED the big one and was about as much fun as plucking out anal hairs!!!… which by the way isn’t really any fun unless you pluck them to use as dental floss to impress your mates…!!!

…anyways… HOLY COW… this was one of the MOST DANGEROUS and suckful rides we have ever been on!!!

Basically, we were on a bullet boat, which is really just a cigar shaped boat with a very big jet engine. It’s normally supposed to only seat 90 people but somehow they managed to squeeze over 130 people on it which really sucked since most people had to sit on the roof and the boat almost rolled over twice…!!!

We were pretty shit scared since we were crammed into the middle of the boat almost below the waterline and the seats were so tight that we had to sit in them in fetal position… and not only that, but there was only one exit out of the boat which was rusted shut and the boat was leaking, so if we capsized we would have been more dead than a very dead thing which is actually quite dead!!! Continue reading

How Much Did The Kat Man Du????

18/4/02

Hey there all you movers, groovers and yak slinging schmoozers…

Well we have just arrived in Singapore and all I can say is HYGEINE ROCKS MAN!!!!

Not only have we been hit by culture shock, but we have arrived during Singapore’s month long food festival so we are in absolute heaven….. well that is only if our bowels return to normal….

Dear God… a solid bowel motion…is that too much to ask???????!! Continue reading

Holy Yak! We Are At Everest Base Camp!!!

15/4/02

Hey there Yakkety Yaks and Abdominal Snowmen

Well, we’ve been back in Katmandu for 2 days now and our feet and knees are STILL sore…not to mention our bums from several bouts of diarrhea….

I actually think I set a record by not showering for 24 days AND with only one change of underwear and even that was only since I shat myself with a lovely bout of the squits….

…Now… was that “wipe with the right hand and eat with the left”???… fuck… I can never remember….

Actually in our group of up to 8 people almost all of us got sick at one stage or another and you can imagine what huge amount of fun it is to have quivering legs whilst using a squat toilet (which is actually just a gap in 2 bits of wood over a 3m hole in the ground) after 8 hours of climbing hills…..

Man, you really end up with thighs of steel just so you don’t fall in…. and I would have to say the most amazing hills aren’t just in the mountains…. we were more impressed with the mountains of sh’it that we saw in the toilets!!!!! You’d definitely need an ice axe and crampons to climb out if you ever fell in….

Still…. despite, the diarrhea, and blisters and sore muscles and busted haemorrhoids and frozen gonads…. I think we had great time…well maybe after the sore joints settle down a bit…..

…phew….you’ll have to excuse us but walking and conversations about bowel habits have preoccupied us for the last 4 weeks….

Anyways, after trekking in the foothills, at day 7 we reached Lukla, which is where most people fly into and from there, the altitude and the landscape really started changing. Continue reading

Yakkety Yak… We Can’t Walk Back…

13/4/02

Tashi Delek!!!!

Hey there dudes and dudettes and other furry animals…

Well here we are in Katmandu again after 25 days of absolutely exhausting trekking to Mount Everest Base Camp…. and all I can say is…. we are ABSOLUTELY and COMPLETELY 100% SHAGGED!!!! ….that’s more shagged than a very shaggy thing in shagsville…. which by the way is quite SHAGGED….

HOLY SHIT… was it bloody HARD or what??!!!… MAN… THAT WAS THE HARDEST THING WE HAVE EVER EVER EVER DONE IN OUR ENTIRE LIFE!!!!

In fact, there were days when the trekking was so hard that we actually cried and the tears almost froze our face off…

Dudes, we basically trekked for 25 days with hugely heavy backpacks and there were days when the temperature was minus 15 degrees and the air was so thin that we huffed and puffed and almost blew ourselves down… Continue reading

HOLY SHIT!!! We’re In The Fucking Himalayas!!!!

27/3/02

HOLY SHIT!!! We’re in the f’ucking Himalayas!!!!

Just a very quick note as we are in the most remote expensive and slow internet cafe in the whole world…

We made it through the foothills of the Himalayas yesterday after 7 days of trekking, so we have joined the normal trekking route now…

We survived walking through the Moaist (terrorist) country without incident and the only danger we faced was from the yaks and avril picking up a giardia tummy bug.

We are currently in a place called Namche Bazaar at 3440m and we got some awesome views of Everest today on an acclimatisation walk

We are heading up towards Everest Base Camp tomorrow… should take us 14 days to acclimatise to the 5440m at Mt Kala Patar overlooking the base camp.

Expecting minus 15 degrees…weather is mixed but today is nice and sunny…no avalanches in this area so we are out of the danger zone except for the altitude. Continue reading